The Apology

Like millions of women, Eve Ensler has been waiting much of her lifetime for an apology. Sexually and physically abused by her father, Eve has struggled her whole life from this betrayal, longing for an honest reckoning from a man who is long dead. After years of work as an anti-violence activist, she decided she would wait no longer; an apology could be imagined, by her, for her, to her. The Apology, written by Eve from her father’s point of view in the words she longed to hear, attempts to transform the abuse she suffered with unflinching truthfulness, compassion, and an expansive vision for the future.

Through The Apology Eve has set out to provide a new way for herself and a possible road for others, so that survivors of abuse may finally envision how to be free. She grapples with questions she has sought answers to since she first realized the impact of her father’s abuse on her life: How do we offer a doorway rather than a locked cell? How do we move from humiliation to revelation, from curtailing behavior to changing it, from condemning perpetrators to calling them to reckoning? What will it take for abusers to genuinely apologize?

Remarkable and original, The Apology is an acutely transformational look at how, from the wounds of sexual abuse, we can begin to re-emerge and heal. It is revolutionary, asking everything of each of us: courage, honesty, and forgiveness.

Decca Aitkenhead, The Sunday Times of London

“…one of the most shatteringly brilliant books I have read. As soon as I finished it, I read it again, and again, and again (really).”

Arifa Akbar, The Guardian

“Profound, imaginative and devastating book … with a moving power and poetry in the prose that rouses Arthur from his grave and holds him to account.”

Ron Charles, The Washington Post

“For those men–the famous and the unknown–The Apology is a blueprint of contrition.”

Marc Maron, host of “WTF with Marc Maron”

“The geometry of toxic masculinity is contained within these pages. I read this book, and it blew me the f*** away . . . A devastating excavation of feelings, sadness, trauma . . . Powerful and bold.”

Naomi Klein

“In this triumph of artistry and empathy, Eve Ensler leaves us with a transformative question: what if the words we most long to hear from another can be located within ourselves? Navigating the rocky rapids between intimacy and annihilation, contrition and forgiveness, autonomy and interdependence, this is a book like no other. Few will emerge unchanged.”